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Sharing is caring, as they say. It's probably something that you haven't done before, but try not to be intimidated— it's great! And it makes sure everyone feels included, because there's nothing more awkward than a threesome with one person on the side being all "hey guys, remember me?! It's a big leap of faith and maybe you thought you were going to be totally into it and all of sudden it's not for you.

That's totally cool.

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Nobody wants you to be uncomfortable. Give it a go, start slowly, and remember at any time you can back out. You may feel like you're letting people down, but no one would want you to go through with it if you're not happy and enjoying yourself. I've always had sort of spur of the moment encounters, but if you're nervous and think it'll help soothe some anxiety then definitely map out some ground rules before you get into it.


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It'll probably be a kind of awkward chat but it's way better than being worried the whole time. Enjoy it! Images: Rawle C. But here it is: 1. Woman A: I wanted to have a more passive role because I had been in a serious committed relationship before, and I was always so curious about how people had sex. But then I felt like I became the center of attention with two people asking me what I wanted, which made sense—I was the one who set it all up, after all.

Woman C: No. That was kind of thrilling. And it was fun for my friend and me to feel like we were seducing this hot guy together. Woman A: Being too tired and a bit stressed out about not knowing what to do. Woman B: Having sex with two people was a lot more difficult than I anticipated, especially since my friend and I are very straight.

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Woman C: Everything was exciting. Woman A: Because I wanted to have a more passive role, I enjoyed just making out with my friend and having her play with me while she and the guy were having sex. Woman B: Him on his back performing oral sex on one of us, while the other one was on top of him, cowgirl-style. Woman B: My friend and I laughed about it afterward.

What It’s Really Like to Have a Threesome

We actually had a friend of ours pick us up the next morning and we gave her details together. Luckily, my friend and I have such a good friendship that jealousy never entered the equation. I think we all just thought it was a sexy little secret between us. Woman C: Yes. We talked about how we felt, what went well, what we would do differently, and whether or not we wanted to do it again. I asked him about how it felt when he touched her, how she tasted, if he had fun, and if he would do it again.

One In Seven Americans Has Had A Threesome And One In Five Finds Them Appealing

Woman A: No. Woman B: Not really. We are open and honest about everything, and this was just a happy memory that we intend to repeat eventually. I would also be interested in doing more with the other woman. Woman C: Not yet. But I think so many woman are actually interested in it and are the ones who initiate it. Also, when I had my first threesome, I felt like I had to stick to my heterosexual identity, which made it hard to get into having sex with a man and another woman. Woman C: That only young people have them.

Definitely have a three-way cuddle afterward. Seriously, if you thought cuddling with one person was great, cuddling with two is amazing. Woman C: Be very picky about your third. Make sure you trust your partner completely and that you both want it. Hitting a point where whatever activity you were doing has come to an end is a good sign, he advised, to start having the actual threesome. Putting it off and putting it off will probably only ensure it never happens.

Expand your definition of what a threesome can actually be. Mihalko referred to this as "adding crayons to your threesome crayon box. He suggested trying things like getting in the shower and making out with each other. Not penetrative sex — but it is sexual, and it is three people.

An amazing threesomes start

Don't wait around for some magical, organic threesome situation to arise. Mihalko said this obviously doesn't really happen in real life, or maybe it does, but only to like celebs or something. Don't hesitate to put this puppy on the calendar. Talking about the threesome you want to have out loud won't ruin it, it'll only help ensure this thing you want to happen will actually happen. If you feel weird or bad talking to someone about a threesome, you probably shouldn't have that threesome.

So let's say you're in the planning stages of this threesome but feel very weird or frustrated talking about it, or the people you're planning with are jusT refusing to talk about it. Mihalko said he's been in this situation before, and it almost always means the entire ordeal is going to be a headache that should just be avoided. If you can't talk about sex with someone, how can you expect to be able to have sex with them? Under no circumstances should you have expectations for this thing to look the way it does in porn.

When Mihalko made this point, someone near me in the back row of the conference room actually yelled out, "oh HELL no! Things are gonna get a little weird, strange sounds might happen, but whatever! You're not on a porn set — this is real human sex.


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